Sunday, October 31, 2010

God's Gas

For fuck's sake...

I was in the Dix, after killing Ayuzer in his mission Apoc, LOL, and then tried inviting this one tool in a Dramiel, and he survived. I then invited him to this convo:

Burseg Sardaukar > howdy
Burseg Sardaukar > y u not like fleet invite
TarnRider > What is you motive
Burseg Sardaukar > lolz?
Burseg Sardaukar > that is a deep question with a very shallow answer
TarnRider > And no not at 1,000,000 ISk per invite
Burseg Sardaukar > LOL
Burseg Sardaukar > how many times did u pay?
TarnRider > ou are a shallow person so I provide3 the simple answers
Burseg Sardaukar > this is true
TarnRider > Did you get paid?
Burseg Sardaukar > i don't get paid anything
Burseg Sardaukar > CSPA goes to no one
TarnRider > What do you want a Fight or a Friend??>?
Burseg Sardaukar > i wanted to warp u to a gas cloud
Burseg Sardaukar > and u get blown up
Burseg Sardaukar > and i laugh
Burseg Sardaukar > end of story
TarnRider > IU was there
Burseg Sardaukar > yea and survived
Burseg Sardaukar > its a test from God
TarnRider > And in the "Gas Cloud " What happens
Burseg Sardaukar > like indian jones
Burseg Sardaukar > i can send u back
Burseg Sardaukar > and u can see the face of god
TarnRider > Been There Jesus'
Burseg Sardaukar > and know Him for Who He truly Is
TarnRider > OOOOOKay
Burseg Sardaukar > and meet Your Maker in the Gas Cloud of Heavenly Enlightenment
Burseg Sardaukar > and He grants uponeth you the Glory only His Almighty Lord can
Burseg Sardaukar > or ur ship will explode
Burseg Sardaukar > one or the other
TarnRider > You're on Drugs or really Fucked up
Burseg Sardaukar > i am one with God
Burseg Sardaukar > i survived teh Gas Cloud
Burseg Sardaukar > do you wish to bask in the Glory of God's Gas?
Burseg Sardaukar > i can send you back to Him
Darth Oriona > lol
Burseg Sardaukar > just accept my hand in our journey
TarnRider > Well Stay close and dont forget to wipe as required. I think you want something you can't have BooHoo
Burseg Sardaukar > I have all i need in the Glory of God's Gas
TarnRider > Say Good Night Shirly!

Friday, October 29, 2010

PF-346 Bombs

For fuck's sake...

Went into PF with Dark and myg0t. Dark shot a bomb, did nothing at all, myg0t shot a bomb and did this:

And destroyed the wreck that had all this:

And we are still sitting here.... nothing to shoot. Just posting this to kill time.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Recon 3/3 Fun

For fuck's sake....

People are retarded. The past 3 days have caused me to leave WH expedition in search of grief. So I got Recon in Dodixie. I then did what any sane person would do with part 3/3: warp unknowing douchebags to their deaths. It is easier to assplane via images so:

Sunday, October 24, 2010


For fuck's sake....

I've begun my wormhole expedition.

After 2 days of bullshit scanning W-space to find someone to fight (that wasn't a Thanatos in a Force Field) I popped into some random Amarr lowsec and found a decent fleet on another wormhole. This is the engagement:

I won, clearly. Additional ships that showed up and did not die were 2 Drakes, another Hurricane, and a Falcon. The Falcon jumped back into the whole after receiving big damage from my drones. After popping the last Hurricane that had a point on me, I was forced to retreat to a station and rep up from 10% armor. My alt was 2 wormholes away with the logi ship, but I survived without it.

Oh, btw, this was all done without the aid of any of my useless alliance members.

New missions suck ass

I'm just minding my own business, trying to work out how to maximise isk/hour missioning, when some noob says he's got into a fight with some NPCs in a belt. Apparently this noob is a powerful one, his name is Korvin and he's on some board of mission running or something (or at least that's the only thing that would be important in this game).

I head to the belt and find Korvin fighting 4 rats of the rokh, oneiros, myrmidon and falcon NPC types just as his mission running friend in a Mega asplodes in a ball of flames. I suddenly realise this could be my time to be an hero and hopefully influence Korvin to implement some of my mission ideas I have been working on. I take my trusty mission Dominix and pound the shit out of those rats while more and more Korvin alts pour in to ninja in on the rat bounties. One of those asshats must have got final blows on the rats or something as I never got the bounty myself. Fuck sake.

So skip a day and I've finished my normal set of missions in the dix for the day and patted myself on the back. Another day of work behind me, man I am awesome. I decided to head to Seyllin, as I heard the ratting there can make me tons of isk.

I decide to grab my most leet mission ship I had, my new Megathron (some asshats insist on calling it a Vindicator, but on reading up on this I discovered this to be a "Pirate" battleship. As my source of income is destroying those filthy vermin, I refuse to acknowledge their ships by their names) and I set destination to Sey.

Unknown to me, CCP have seemingly introduced a new type of mission where rats you destroyed previously respawn on a gate and attempt to rape you. While I appreciate them making my missions more exciting it would be nice if they made a dev blog about this or gave me a phone call or something.

So I jump into Sey and am met by an NPC spawn of doom. A HIC rat scrambles me and, while I try to flee like a girl back to the gate, more rats come in and, using new CCP created AI, start bumping me as I make my way back to the gate. More and more BC and BS rats spawn and I need to start overloading my AB, reps and cap boosters to keep up with the dps of this first room. I lock up one of the Hurricane NPCs and open fire....and after 3 rounds some arsehole rat jams me.

Seriously CCP, what the fuck? Do you want me to make vast quantities of isk easily in missions or don't you? For fuck's sake. Or at least just make them ignore me unless I engage first, as I wanted to do some lucrative belt ratting.

I recall drones and wait out my aggro while the rats keep spawning. As one of my reps burns out, taking a hardener with it, I start imagining how I'm going to murder every member of CCP who had a hand in designing this shitty new mission. Just as I give up the gate fires and I jump into the second room. CCP has a sick sense of humour as this room has fuck all rats in it!

I decide to decline the mission and head back to the dix to repair.

Fuck you CCP

Friday, October 22, 2010

Eye Ron Nee

[ 2010.10.23 01:19:54 ] rezell > Yea man !! Look at my vindy !! I'll never get off station
[ 2010.10.23 01:19:55 ] Hot Tubes > PREPARE FOR ROUND 2
[ 2010.10.23 01:20:00 ] Tio Key > yup yup
[ 2010.10.23 01:20:02 ] Hot Tubes > THAT'S ME
[ 2010.10.23 01:20:04 ] Hot Tubes > YEA
[ 2010.10.23 01:20:08 ] Hot Tubes > CAPITALS
[ 2010.10.23 01:20:13 ] DR BiCarbonate > fuckin badass
[ 2010.10.23 01:20:19 ] Hot Tubes > AWW THANKS MAN
[ 2010.10.23 01:20:24 ] Tio Key > thank u thank u very much
[ 2010.10.23 01:20:24 ] Hot Tubes > THAT'S REALLY NICE OF YOU
[ 2010.10.23 01:21:02 ] rezell > dont be nice to the dumbshit fleet
[ 2010.10.23 01:21:09 ] Tio Key > well sence this ur MO then ill dock till ur ready to fight
[ 2010.10.23 01:21:21 ] Hot Tubes > OK THAT'S KEWL
[ 2010.10.23 01:21:29 ] Tio Key > .I.
[ 2010.10.23 01:21:31 ] Hot Tubes > I'M KIND OF TOO NERVOUS TO FIGHT RIGHT NOW ANYWAY
[ 2010.10.23 01:21:39 ] Tio Key > stfu
[ 2010.10.23 01:21:47 ] Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:21:53 ] Hot Tubes > I SHALL LOOK THAT UP IN MY DICTIONARY
[ 2010.10.23 01:22:14 ] Hot Tubes > OMG
[ 2010.10.23 01:22:16 ] Hot Tubes > IT'S NOT HERE
[ 2010.10.23 01:22:17 ] Hot Tubes > LOL
[ 2010.10.23 01:22:46 ] Hot Tubes > OK, I'M READY TO FIGHT YOUR CARRIER IN MY VINDI NOW
[ 2010.10.23 01:22:50 ] Hot Tubes > JK, I'M TOO NERVOUS
[ 2010.10.23 01:22:51 ] Hot Tubes > LOL
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:00 ] Tio Key > i love to block stupid poeple CYA
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:05 ] A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:12 ] rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:17 ] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:21 ] rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:25 ] DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:21] rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:26 ] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:31 ] rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:37 ] rezell > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunch...
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:38 ] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:42 ] rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:43 ] DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:38] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:46 ] rezell > DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:38] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:48 ] A Lunchbox > DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:38] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTAND
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:50 ] rezell > rezell > DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:38] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'...
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:54 ] DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:51] rezell > rezell > DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:38] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox &gt...
[ 2010.10.23 01:23:54 ] rezell > rezell > rezell > DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:38] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes...
[ 2010.10.23 01:28:55 ] Hot Tubes > PLEASE DON'T SPAM LOCAL
[ 2010.10.23 01:28:58 ] Hot Tubes > I FIND IT OFFENSIVE
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:02 ] DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:55] rezell > rezell > rezell > DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:38] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A ...
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:05 ] JetSun > Hot Tubes > PLEASE DON'T SPAM LOCAL
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:11 ] JetSun > I don't give a hit what you find it
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:18 ] Hot Tubes > HIT?
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:31 ] Hot Tubes > THAT DON'T MAKE NO SENSE TO ME
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:40 ] DR BiCarbonate > [01:29:03] DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:55] rezell > rezell > rezell > DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:38] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell >...
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:40 ] JetSun > Hot Tubes > PLEASE DON'T SPAM LOCAL
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:41 ] JetSun > Hot Tubes > PLEASE DON'T SPAM LOCAL
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:43 ] JetSun > Hot Tubes > PLEASE DON'T SPAM LOCAL
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:51 ] A Lunchbox > JetSun > Hot Tubes > PLEASE DON'T SPAM LOCAL
[ 2010.10.23 01:29:56 ] JetSun > Hot Tubes > PLEASE DON'T SPAM LOCAL I'M AN IDIOT
[ 2010.10.23 01:31:06 ] A Lunchbox > REPORTING FAGS
[ 2010.10.23 01:31:10 ] A Lunchbox > A Lunchbox > REPORTING FAGS
[ 2010.10.23 01:31:29 ] A Lunchbox > o fail
[ 2010.10.23 01:32:28 ] A Lunchbox > reported for reporting
[ 2010.10.23 01:35:02 ] Hot Tubes > PLEASE BE NICE
[ 2010.10.23 01:35:36 ] A Lunchbox > THIS IS US BEING NICE
[ 2010.10.23 01:36:09 ] Wickedperf > lol
[ 2010.10.23 01:39:27 ] Hot Tubes > WHY CAN'T YOU JUST BE NICE
[ 2010.10.23 01:39:28 ] Hot Tubes > LOL
[ 2010.10.23 01:43:30 ] Hot Tubes > THAT'S BETTER GUYS, THANKS :D
[ 2010.10.23 01:44:19 ] A Lunchbox > wat
[ 2010.10.23 01:44:27 ] A Lunchbox > sry I had to rub one out
[ 2010.10.23 01:47:52 ] Hot Tubes > STOP CHASING ME, LOL
[ 2010.10.23 01:50:21 ] DR BiCarbonate > no
[ 2010.10.23 01:50:54 ] TumZ > wb
[ 2010.10.23 01:50:58 ] JetSun > lol
[ 2010.10.23 01:57:53 ] Hot Tubes > OK GUYS I'M LEAVING, THAT WAS SOME GOOD PVP THOUGH
[ 2010.10.23 01:57:56 ] Hot Tubes > GF
[ 2010.10.23 01:57:58 ] Hot Tubes > O/
[ 2010.10.23 01:58:10 ] DR BiCarbonate > ya man
[ 2010.10.23 01:58:15 ] rezell > rezell > rezell > rezell > DR BiCarbonate > [01:23:38] A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox > Hot Tubes > I DON'T UNDERSTANDrezell > A Lunchbox > rezell > A Lunchbox &g...
[ 2010.10.23 01:58:50 ] Hot Tubes > LOOKING FORWARD TO MORE ELITE PVP
[ 2010.10.23 01:59:09 ] DR BiCarbonate > nothing more elite than staying on station

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Poop, vomit and bible

[ 2010.10.22 02:29:09 ] Lord AlBannII > all nood go to test server
[ 2010.10.22 02:29:30 ] Lord AlBannII > why its fun
[ 2010.10.22 02:29:42 ] Burseg Sardaukar > its shitty
[ 2010.10.22 02:29:56 ] Burseg Sardaukar > u don't accomplish anything meaningful there
[ 2010.10.22 02:30:40 ] Lord AlBannII > you do if you know what you are doing
[ 2010.10.22 02:31:01 ] Lord AlBannII > BS rat 5-1 sey
[ 2010.10.22 02:31:15 ] Burseg Sardaukar > no
[ 2010.10.22 02:31:16 ] Burseg Sardaukar > u don't
[ 2010.10.22 02:31:18 ] Burseg Sardaukar > no matter what
[ 2010.10.22 02:31:21 ] myg0t Azide > even better, to be honest, the root of all modern rock... check out the pickin....
[ 2010.10.22 02:31:23 ] myg0t Azide >
[ 2010.10.22 02:31:23 ] Burseg Sardaukar > because it has no bearing on TQ
[ 2010.10.22 02:31:40 ] Lord AlBannII > TQ?
[ 2010.10.22 02:32:43 ] Burseg Sardaukar > the real server
[ 2010.10.22 02:32:44 ] Burseg Sardaukar > that we are on
[ 2010.10.22 02:33:54 ] Lord AlBannII > but it can help you remember y started this game to have fun
[ 2010.10.22 02:34:30 ] Lord AlBannII > I hope
[ 2010.10.22 02:34:51 ] Burseg Sardaukar > the main server is for that
[ 2010.10.22 02:34:57 ] Burseg Sardaukar > don't relaly know how accomplishing nothing
[ 2010.10.22 02:34:59 ] Burseg Sardaukar > is fun...
[ 2010.10.22 02:35:07 ] Burseg Sardaukar > because the SP u earn there is uesless
[ 2010.10.22 02:35:20 ] Burseg Sardaukar > the tactics aren't applicable to the real server
[ 2010.10.22 02:35:23 ] Burseg Sardaukar > there's no risk in pvp
[ 2010.10.22 02:35:30 ] Burseg Sardaukar > running missions there is useless
[ 2010.10.22 02:35:35 ] Lord AlBannII > so is the stuff in the game
[ 2010.10.22 02:35:53 ] Lord AlBannII > we still fight for it
[ 2010.10.22 02:36:06 ] Lord AlBannII > some to tears
[ 2010.10.22 02:36:10 ] Burseg Sardaukar > uhh
[ 2010.10.22 02:36:18 ] Lord AlBannII > gf
[ 2010.10.22 02:36:18 ] Burseg Sardaukar > nothing on that server matters
[ 2010.10.22 02:36:26 ] Burseg Sardaukar > u know that, right?
[ 2010.10.22 02:36:31 ] Burseg Sardaukar > they mirror it every couple months
[ 2010.10.22 02:36:37 ] Burseg Sardaukar > and it erases everything ud id on there
[ 2010.10.22 02:36:48 ] Lord AlBannII > what matters on this server
[ 2010.10.22 02:36:58 ] Burseg Sardaukar > its a progressive universe
[ 2010.10.22 02:37:28 ] Lord AlBannII > so is a fire
[ 2010.10.22 02:37:41 ] Burseg Sardaukar > this must be some black stuff i don't get
[ 2010.10.22 02:37:53 ] Burseg Sardaukar > i need to take a step back in evolution to get that one
[ 2010.10.22 02:38:01 ] myg0t Azide > insert racist comment here
[ 2010.10.22 02:38:20 ] Lord AlBannII > i can sit in my living room and watch that to
[ 2010.10.22 02:38:30 ] Burseg Sardaukar > umm
[ 2010.10.22 02:38:31 ] Burseg Sardaukar > okay
[ 2010.10.22 02:38:35 ] Burseg Sardaukar > u can do that for free
[ 2010.10.22 02:38:53 ] Lord AlBannII > so is the test server
[ 2010.10.22 02:38:57 ] Burseg Sardaukar > no
[ 2010.10.22 02:39:03 ] Burseg Sardaukar > ur paying a subsciption
[ 2010.10.22 02:39:12 ] Burseg Sardaukar > if u stop paying for TQ access u lose SiSi access
[ 2010.10.22 02:39:20 ] Lord AlBannII > yes it comes with the game
[ 2010.10.22 02:39:26 ] Burseg Sardaukar > so ur paying for it
[ 2010.10.22 02:39:28 ] Burseg Sardaukar > thus it isn't free
[ 2010.10.22 02:39:35 ] myg0t Azide > so, if whites could dunk, would Condoleesa be quiet in a movie theatre?
[ 2010.10.22 02:39:47 ] Hot Tubes > you may as well go play some free mmo instead as the pvp is the same, no risk
[ 2010.10.22 02:39:54 ] Hot Tubes > at least you're not wasting money
[ 2010.10.22 02:40:06 ] Lord AlBannII > i pay for a house with a fire place to
[ 2010.10.22 02:40:13 ] Hot Tubes > you're a fucking idiot
[ 2010.10.22 02:40:18 ] Hot Tubes > go throw yourself on your fire
[ 2010.10.22 02:40:32 ] Burseg Sardaukar > thats free too
[ 2010.10.22 02:40:53 ] Lord AlBannII > in God's eye we are all the same
[ 2010.10.22 02:41:00 ] Hot Tubes > except poop
[ 2010.10.22 02:41:04 ] Hot Tubes > it's higher
[ 2010.10.22 02:41:12 ] Hot Tubes > except when my arse is above it
[ 2010.10.22 02:41:16 ] Hot Tubes > then my arse is higher
[ 2010.10.22 02:41:19 ] myg0t Azide > i predict beaner is on the pill
[ 2010.10.22 02:41:22 ] myg0t Azide > or the bottle
[ 2010.10.22 02:41:25 ] Hot Tubes > and when i poop on a picture of god i'm above god
[ 2010.10.22 02:41:28 ] Hot Tubes > with my ass
[ 2010.10.22 02:41:28 ] Burseg Sardaukar > tequila
[ 2010.10.22 02:41:52 ] myg0t Azide > lol , lay off the firewater chief
[ 2010.10.22 02:42:24 ] Lord AlBannII > it can come out of your mouth as well as your behined
[ 2010.10.22 02:42:47 ] Hot Tubes > yea
[ 2010.10.22 02:42:50 ] Hot Tubes > both over the bible
[ 2010.10.22 02:44:06 ] Lord AlBannII > ex you have a chioce what come out of your mouth
[ 2010.10.22 02:44:23 ] Hot Tubes > i choose to vomit poop over the bible
[ 2010.10.22 02:44:57 ] Lord AlBannII > that's a chioce
[ 2010.10.22 02:45:07 ] Hot Tubes > and poop out vomit
[ 2010.10.22 02:45:14 ] Hot Tubes > over the bible

Mother Fucker

So, today I was home chowing on some leftover chink food. Then then he mother fuckin phone rings. Surprise surprise it's the old lady her mother fucking car died. She is all flustered because It is in the middle of the mother fucking road, after doing a illegal u-turn. So I'm like, mother fucker cause i got to put pants on and save her ass right. Anyway i get her home, I take my pants off all exited to eat my chink food. Only to realize its mother fucking cold now. I didn't want to re-heat it since i did once already. So mother fucker i was pissed. Also I forgot to mention it rained all mother fucking night. Now I'm fuckin wet, cold, and hungry all because of her, and she didn't even thank me FUCK.


Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Trickling Failure

For fuck's sake...

Noob (blackjackwhitey) was in Dodixie, for whatever reason, in a nemesis, for whatever reason, crying in alliance chat that 2+ wt's were camping him. Col went to check it, yup, confirmed, a noob NOT ON VENT was crying about shit we told him to now allow himself to be trapped in. I logged off my alt, logged into Burseg, flew to Dix, got a ragtag fleet together, jumped in. Iron and Seth were not paying attention, warped in WELL after I was dead, so we managed to all get picked off one by one. Another in the long list of failures from this inept alliance I torture myself with running.... Just wait for the day they all cry that I never tell them about fleet ops.

Here's the aftermath, btw:

Oh yea, and neutral RR was prevalent in the last moments of the fight, making it a no-win anyway, but still.

Return of Hell's Rejects

For fuck's sake...

I guess the HR and BP and their alts etc have come back to Seyllin, I suppose they assume they will get a good fight from us (lol, US, lolzzzz) or something. Their definition of a good fight, as most define it, is they drop carriers on any sizable force we assemble, so they're going to have to fight against the swarm of Tristans and Vexors we have accumulated for the now-dying 0rphanage war. This one engagement:

put us over them in the current campaign:

as far as isk-value is concerned, and I can't imagine they'll be excited losing more expensive stuff they insist on flying to our shit fleets of shit ships with shit FC's. With enough retards, one could move the world.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Guise... itz okya 2 ruun mishunz naow, rayyyittte?

For fuck's sake...

It took them more than a week of war to do it, but my shit alliance managed to lose something super-expensive to war targets while running missions. Surprisingly Ming didn't have a sack load of excuses the typical noob does when they get pwned.

"I WAS watching local, they just were there so fast!"
"I looked away for a second!"
"I don't like wars or pvp, so i don't know why they'd even attack me!"
"You didn't (warn me/help me/tell me the war was still going on/give me ISK so I didn't have to run missions/insert accusatory statement deflecting blame here) and it got me killed!"

etc etc etc

There's the details, btw. No t2 invuls? No t2 launchers? Boost-fit Navy Scorp?? There are so many things wrong with this. Col Relentless's rage kicked ass.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Hey guys, can I come help you with your kill? Lol, jk, I'll do it myself!

So some asshole who's never on vent, Bastilla I think, scans out a mission running Domi in ane. He warps out and logs, though the mission isn't finished yet. As we are fucking pathetic we are all more than willing to wait an indefinite period of time to kill some shit fit mission battleship in some gloriously OTT fireball.

He logs back on, and Bastilla and Col Relentless are waiting in one of the rooms of the guy's mission for when he warps back. I naturally decide this is a perfect time for my first Vindi kill (though, weirdly enough, not actually the first kill the ship itself has done ) and I get to Ane. The domi warps to the mission and I ask if I should warp after him. I get an OK from Col.

I have to admit at this point I already knew how this would end. But hey, I was just following orders!

I warp in and he's on the first acceleration gate. As he warps through he obviously must have seen me. I follow straight through after him and it turns out the rest of those fucktards decided to wait in the 2nd room rather than the 1st. Surprise surprise, I land 5km from the guy as he's already aligning for something.

Fuck the rest of them.

I am teh leet hax pvp pilot.

Col starts fagging out on vent, something about how they scanned the guy out and waited 30 minutes for him only for me to swoop in and asplode his pixels. I reassured him that he was a valuable team player and that he should sleep well knowing he got me an easy BS kill without me having to put in any work whatsoever.

I think he took it well, though he mumbled something about never letting me know when he finds a ship ever again. He'll probably get his ass kicked so it should prove entertaining.

Also, on the subject of needless OTT kills, some warts came into Sey/Ane and, with the aid of a Falcon and what looked to be another neutral falcon, 2 brutixes and a sleipnir, proceeded to pummel our t1 cruiser asses into the ground.

Naturally I got butthurt, so when they returned in battleships I was determined that EVERYTHING I COULD POINT WOULD FUCKING DIE. As I could only point 1 thing, it died. I also may have blown on the Smerg bugle a little needlessly and summoned way OTT blackup.

(An archive image of beaner previously blowing the Smerg Bugle )

So another quality kill was achieved.

People out to get me!!!!

No Shit There I Was

So a few weeks ago, I'm flying around in a fleet with Burseg and a few others. We are ratting and trying to catch noobs doing missions. So we find this one noob, in a drake i believe, and we all warp in to take him out. Now i'm flying my trusty dramiel and other ppl in the corp are jealous of me and my ship. Well so i warp in to the gate. and start orbiting the drake. Well wouldn't you know it someones jealousy gets the best of them and the get the gate guns to pop my darm. not sure how they did it but these fags are always out to get me anyway they can. they are jjealous of my pvp skills i tell ya

Old and New Enemies

For fuck's sake...

Po3tank claims that Basgerin Pirates and Hell's Rejects will be moving into Seyllin for the foreseeable future. This will include capital, which will all be killed by Siggi Lai's Nyx, if not more, depending on Lord Mummbi's mood that day I suppose. This will hopefully crush the spirits of all the cocky little faggots in my alliance that think they know how to PVP. And douchenozzles that don't spend time getting their sec up, like Huntin4Penis and Seth's alt will be super screwed since when they get engaged, we are no longer coming to aid since I'm not losing sec because they refuse to get theirs up. Must be lonely at -10, sucks to be them.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Reset standings

So I've been told that I will have more NPCs to shoot at than normal. Apparently some pirate rats called DEP are now neutral to us, and these are the only assholes who have stuck with us for a long period of time, or something. So we must have exceeded ourselves in the retardation station.

Due to this Darth left us. While I'm happy we'll have one less baboon screaming at us on vent I don't understand why she didn't just decline the offer she got from her agent.

War in Jita, Followed by Diplomacy retardation

For fuck's sake...

Okay, we get bored in Sey, decide to head to Jita, a wartarget stronghold. Since we suck serious balls, it would most certainly end in total disaster. Which it did. Tubes, the mission running fag, couldn't hack being able to warp away from an engagement and got pwned when my tactical sense was tingling and told us to leave. Also, salid's new "main" got popped immediately on warp-in, due to him sucking complete ass as well.

Move forward an hour. We got into Amarr space, chased some war target in a curse, who then logged mid-warp. I attempted to have my members go get me a scan probe launcher (which took them about 5m to pull off, no surprise) and tried scanning the target. This failed due to Salid being retarded. End of story.

Another hour or so, we move into Seyllin. We rat for a bit, and one of our members, Huntin4Penis, gets pointed by a blue, after we already warned the guy in the past 24 hrs that it will cost his corp "blue" standings. It's good to see that not only General Tso's alliance is completely fucking stupid and can't understand directions. We killed his damnation.

Naturally I pulled all the weight. Jade was in a fucking retriever... no surprise there either. There was all kinds of delicious rage in local, and general acceptance from that blue's corpmates. They know the rules.

And now DEP is neutral. Let the chaos in Seyllin begin.

This blog is now about missions

What the hell went wrong in my life?

All I've ever wanted is to run my missions and make my fake money. Yet somehow I'm in with these assholes who are getting decced by every dick in Eve.

Then they all make me get involved with nasty pvp and hastily warp away from the station we were fighting at, leaving me to get shot at by lots of enemy NPC ships with stars on their symbol.

What the hell?! All I know is this is somehow related to being at war.

I petitioned ccp for being scrambled and webbed by the mission rats outside the station when I hadn't even accepted any mission. I eagerly await their reply.

Multiple Accounts and Deleting Chars

For fuck's sake...

So this noob, Bracel/Vikrosa has deleted a SECOND toon. Seriously? The first time he did it was because he emoraged since his secstatus was below -5 and he never made an effort whatsoever to get his sec back up via minor effort (ratting occasionally). There are fags in the alliance like Yin, Nenoco, Huntin4Penis69, etc that are fine being -10 and all, and thankfully they aren't part of the retards that bitch that "we don't do anything wahhhhhhhhhhh you are so BORING!" like half the retards that ragequit the alliance. Bracel, on the other hand, is a true winner. Instead of putting forward any shred of effort to maintain his character he just deletes the fucking toon when he rages. This is such an awesome idea, btw. Everyone that rages should adopt the "undo all the effort from the past months/years of training and start-from-scratch" approach. I've had idiots in the alliance that have done this before, but never a two-timer. This is truly extraordinary retardation. Once again, though, there is little surprise that someone of this caliber had been allowed into SMERG.... twice. We will not, however, give this fuck head another chance..

On a similar level of genius, I support any player that adopts the Lord AlbannII approach to Eve: Train multiple characters on one account. Shawngreenvine once was this brilliant, and was somehow exploiting, training both accounts simultaneously (but he was a notorious troll, and most likely was lying). If everyone else in the alliance did the same thing, we could have 3 shit toons per player, which is a better excuse for sucking at this game than whatever the fuck they claim is the cause today.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Why do men have nipples?

Short entry here.

So, I was sitting on vent (it was screaming because I was suffocating it) after half of the homo's logged, and it was pretty gay. Targamarr, his long lost brother Tex Steele, Salid, and Col were all silent, due to the fact that I love my voice and I was talking non-stop. During all of this I'm trying to finish jerking off because it's fucking 1 AM. Now, as I was looking for an excuse to log and fighting off the urge to continue talking, TARGAMARR, NOT JADE, brought up religion. REALLY?

So, of course, he goes on to say how his translation of the bible says how Satan = Jesus whereas my version states Jesus = Satan. He defends how his version wasn't translated from other translations; it was the actual word of God. And by God, he meant the words of greedy hooked-nosed heebs that had schizophrenia and wrote down what their other voice had said. Saild, as useless as he is, brings up a totally irrelevant point that "science always contradicts religion." Tex then goes on with his cool story about how God was a computer. Somehow, God created a bunch of men, and they started to have a gay orgy. God, BEING A FUCKING BUZZKILL, smote them all by crushing them with a GIANT VAGINA. God then created white people. To SCREW them over, he created USELESS Jews, Spics, COONS and other shitty subhuman races. I must say a weird position for a Bible Thumper.

So, RAGED AS FUCK, I tell them all to screw themselves, because I can't stand any more of NOT HEARING MY VOICE.


Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Annoying shit on 10/13 (evetime)

For fuck's sake...

Timetable of shit:
0215 - Lord Albannii called a target being in Apor when we already knew it, and proceeded to scream like a baboon into the mic to get us to listen to useless information.
0233 - Targamarr asking to link the system we were heading to, when it was already linked.
0242 - We had to blob some poor war target like a bunch of fucking noobs... its the only way to provide that we don't get massacred, which is generally the most common outcome.

0304 - My gloriousness caused THE GOD SQUAD to retract the war. They probably felt bad for all the fuckheads in my alliance constantly losing ships.

0325 - Engagement in Anttiri FAILURE! I warped fleet when trying to get my my ass away from their idiocy, telling them to ctrl-space. NONE LISTENED. Useless idiots. No wonder they retracted the war, I'd be embarrassed to see this shit too.

We Suck Serious Balls At War

For fuck's sake...

Well, leave it to General Tso's Alliance (headed by my shit head corp, SMERG) to get their shit CRUSHED by two separate merc alliances, The 0rphanage and THE GOD SQUAD. Our losses are staggering, no surprise. We seriously suck ass at this game. Check these stats:

Over 100 losses.... you have got to be fucking kidding me. I try my hardest to organize and bestow upon these retards my wisdom of PVP, but I am constantly disappointed. It never fails. If I'm not there to coordinate at a level only Grand Admiral Thrawn himself could appreciate, they do nothing but fail. Even during my commands, the noob tards like anyone from .BMF. or even the Targamarr's and Justsharkbaits and Lord AlbannII's manage to babble over my orders as if they had ANYTHING of value to add at all. The amount of times I have to repeat locations and staging points and strategies has me popping Xanax like Jade shoves doughnuts down his throat, or Dark with cocks in his asshole.

Oh, yea, if you want more fail, check this bullshit:
This one doesn't have AS MANY losses, thank Satan. But give it time, this shit alliance will find some way to get over 100 losses. Just give it time...

A little piece of Harbi

What the fahell? We got wardecced by these bad ass alliances and their strategy is so brilliant, it borders on evil genius. The force us to seek them out on their turf, engage, and we lose a ton of stuff. I mean jeebus, we're not even a week in and we've lost over 120 ships!
All I can say about this war is ffs. I mean it's quite obvious to myself, and all of my alliance-mates that our pixels are not only inferior, but our war targets pixels are: "Far Superior."
By the way, is it still considered getting raped if it's consensual? Food for thought, food for thought.

For Fuck's Sake

For fuck's sake....

Since that fag dereekb left my shit alliance, there has been no one to boost the egos of all the worthless assholes in the alliance via some gay ass blog, so i figured it's high time to put my oft-vocalized rants from ventrilo into a permenant text format for all the fuckheads to read over and over so they understand how useless each and every one of them is. I'll keep this first post short... fuck General Tso's Alliance.